Wednesday, October 28, 2020

 At What Cost: A Reflection for 10/28/20

Seven months, 33 weeks, 229 days, 5,486 hours, 329,218 minutes, 19,753,096+ seconds…..That’s how long has been since March 13th, 2020.  Take that into consideration for just a few more additional seconds as the clock continues to tick.  While you are doing that, take into consideration any other year in your life where you can almost number the days spanning over a 7 month period where so much has changed yet nothing really has changed at all.  I am not sure that I can. 

Over the past seven months I have sat in too many meetings to count; I have slept too little hours to care and I have watched many who I care about go through multiple emotional roller coasters to last two lifetimes.  We have watched everything that we accepted as normal and took for granted for so long be pulled from us.  Our schools, our churches, our sports, our jobs, our safety and security, and our peace all removed without any clear end in sight.  We have been told to be brave while still considering our own fear and uncertainty.  Many of us have been asked to plan without direction.  We have done these things, “soldiered on” through the turmoil and uncertainty which is our world at all levels and we have done so because any alternative seems yet even more difficult to comprehend than our current reality does.  I was told merely what seems like eternal three months ago to “just keep showing up”.  It’s not that I disagree, but at what cost.  What is going to be left when it’s all said and done? 

I don’t say these things to add to any negativity.  I don’t bring up these issues to suggest the idea that all is lost no more than I would suggest that the end is in sight.  I say this because it’s true and sometimes the truth sucks.  The statistics I have become more concerned about these days are the ones that aren’t being reported on a seemingly hourly basis.  I’m worried about our children, my children.  I’m worried about our leaders and the decisions, more so the motivation behind, the decisions they are making.  I’m worried about our schools and churches.  I’m worried about our economy.  I’m worried about our mental health.  I, like many of you, worry about the same things but most of all, I worry about what our lives are going to look like when it is all over.  Concern without answer/direction equals fear; and when we have no answers, no explanation what left do we have to do but pray. 

Today’s Gospel follows Jesus, yet again, as He quietly slips off to talk with His Father.  My grandfather once told me that God will never give you more than you can handle however, there will often be times that you wish He didn’t think you can handle so much.  I would suggest that the unprecedented events covering the past 7 months would certainly qualify.  I have always been a man of prayer, but never so much as I have been through all this.  I find myself praying, at times out loud, seemingly throughout the day; in the cafeteria, on a morning run, in the car at the dinner table..  If nothing else, I have found myself living the behavior Jesus modeled for us during His documented alone times with His Father.  Perhaps that is the cost.  The exchange for the past 7 months of uncertainty is the Peace I receive from my alone times with my Heavenly Father.  If in fact this is true, it is a cost I am willing to continue to pay.

“Thank you God for our blessings in the midst of our trials.”

Jason C. Swann – Principal